6 w 4 days photos

Baby O has a heartbeat

Got an ultrasound at work today and there was a heartbeat !!!! We could see it flickering on the screen!!!

Also some bonus pictures of the bloat :)

6 weeks

Posted on my due date board

So...who wants to get vulnerable with me??

Maybe triggering... mentions of injury and eating disorders...

.

.

.

.

.

.

I have struggled with my weight all my life.  I was bulimic and anorexic since high school... when I got pregnant with my first daughter, just eating normally caused me to gain 80 lbs.  after I had her, I resorted to bad habits and lost the weight...

Then, four years later, I got pregnant with my second daughter and the cycle continues.  Only gained 26 lbs because I was better about working out and eating...this was in 2007.

Then, I got into running and triathlons... primarily ultra Marathons, half Ironman triathlons, marathons, Olympic triathlons, and then a little bit of all distances up to that... I started training in 2008 and mid-2009, I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis... 

I didn’t let that stop me and kept training.  What does this have to do with anything?  Well, I’m 2014, I was having severe hip pain that I thought was just due to my arthritis or just a result of the heavy training schedule... then, one evening (August 29, 2014), my daughter called me into the kitchen to kill a spider.  I had been getting around on crutches but I came running out of the room (while on the phone with Jaclyn of all people...) and spun around quickly to find the insect... 

I felt a pop in my hip and thought I had dislocated it...

Well anyway - flash forward to a little while later in an ambulance, at the hospital, surgery to repair a “garden 3 femoral neck fracture” that put three pins in my hip and left one leg and inch shorter than the other...

Flash forward to 12 weeks of not walking, no gym... another surgery to replace the hip itself since the pins that they had put in my hip had broken...  being told to never run again... muscle loss, weight gain, etc...

But I was told that I could have a baby and give birth vaginally.

Anyway... I finally kicked the eating disorder once and for all about 5 months ago... started doing intermittent fasting and keto... and after 3 years of no cycle, with the help of provera, finally has a period in July.  When i didn’t get another one in August, I was bummed (and not pregnant!) but around August 25th, I started to feel the telltale “ovulation” cramps and changes to my cervical mucus and cervix that indicates ovulation.  My temps also matched with ovulation... so I took some opk’s and they showed rising and then peak LH :). So we did what we needed to do and sure enough... got pregnant.

After 3 years of no cycle and so much odd history, I’m still shocked.  I can’t help but worry that this is too good to be true and so until I hear/see the heartbeat, I’m kind of in shock and maybe a bit of denial.

Though there’s no denying the nausea and bloat, lol.

Anyway.... that’s me. Just wondering if anyone else is either 

A) someone with a chronic illness

and/or

B) someone who has had a hip replacement or other surgery that could possibly affect delivery

And/or

C) recovered from an eating disorder and is trying to just "be happy" with the bloating and bodily changes that pregnant brings.

And\or

D) just wants to share and be vulnerable in a safe space (this post)

Belly radiation badge

Pics

Announcement options

Pics from 9/18

Baby O’s first ultrasound

Yesterday, I got an amazing treat!! I went to the ultrasound department and asked if there was an OB student who needed first trimester comps..

Turns out that there was....so I got an ultrasound!!

Baby is measuring as s/he could and I’m due may 19, 2019, per the scan..

Best part - I can go weekly if I want... there are a few studies that say too many is bad so I’ll probably go next week and hear the heartbeat and then wait for awhile for the rest of the scans!!

A mom podcast in the works?

I really want to do a pregnancy/parenting podcast...

“Mad about Motherhood”

“The Mama Bear Lair”

“Super Moms”

“The Invisible Cape”

“Toddlers and Teenagers”

I don’t know... basically find a friend to cohost with me (or different guests every week) to tackle controversial and important topics about motherhood and maternity. I have a couple friends in mind to ask, but I don’t know what it would take to actually get this off the ground... 

Fears

Until I have my ultrasound, I’m going to worry.  We want this so badly and our families are so excited.  However, until October 1st when  I actually can SEE that there’s a baby and a heartbeat, I’m going to be worrying about it.

I’ve taken so many tests and have had my hcg levels checked thrice... still waiting on the results from the third test... but I’m definitely struggling with letting myself relax about it...

Did my hcg levels again today

We will see what they are tomorrow... anxious!!

They were:

9/11: 292

9/13: 694

9/17: ???

Today’s pics (4w6, 5 w 1 or 5 w 2...)